Not yet!

We had a rough night last night. It doesn't surprise me since Jake did seem to feel well yesterday. I'm not even sure how long or how many times I had to go settle him down last night before he went to sleep. Mike's sister came over and the two of them were being kind of noisy and it didn't help my process. His sister didn't leave until about eleven and my goal was to be in bed before ten. It was probably nine thirty before I got Jake settled in.


He woke up about two forty I think and it took two hours to get him happy enough to go back to sleep. I was so tired and stressed by the time that was all accomplished. I got in bed and I think I cried for half an hour before I fell asleep. I don't know how I am going do everything and be sane. I am not ready to go to work and give my baby to someone else. I don't have a choice. And I am really worried about our financial picture. Mike has really been getting yanked around at work again and his income is so terrible. We sat and talked the other night about if he were to do it all over again would he go to engine school or not. He doesn't think he would. I asked him where the friend was that stopped by on Thursday was on "the list" as far as going to school and Mike wasn't sure. They talked about it and Mike told him that if he really wants to drive the train then he should go, but if he wants to do it for job security like Mike did or if he wants to do it for higher earning potential than don't do it It isn't worth it. So far that is very very true.


I am getting headaches again. I would guess it is because I am stressing and maybe a little bit to do with hormones. I am so glad my headaches were better during my pregnancy. Thank God that was one thing that went my way! My skin is going to hell again and I would guess it is more of the same. I think that is so funny. Frustrating, but funny. My skin was the best it has ever been while I was pregnant.


I am so tired. If I can get Jake to go to sleep for more than ten minutes I might take a nap. I haven't even been able to get a shower yet today. The only thing I have been able to accomplish was to get the dishwasher unloaded. I guess I turned the dryer on too since it is still full of clothes I washed yesterday. They are going to be lovely! I need to get cleaning... Plus Mike and I need to get outside. It is supposed to snow tonight and tomorrow and we have leaves all over. The problem is maybe a tenth of our leaves have fallen. We have a lot of big trees with a lot of leaves.

I was planning on going to church tomorrow since I have only taken Jake once, but I'm not sure if I can do it. If it looks like I am going to be able to sleep I don't think we will go. Monday we have to start getting up before four so hopefully by the following Monday we can have our mornings figures out. I think I smell a dirty diaper on this little boy wiggling in my lap!