The beginning? The end?

I hardly slept last night. I had a ticket to a high school musical that had been rescheduled from Saturday night. We had a blizzard so they changed it. That made it hard because it didn't get over until a little after 10 and I had to be up at 5. I'm old and don't cope with that very well. The musical was great and a much needed distraction. I had very fitful sleep filled with bad dreams. You see, today our interim director started and my boss told us she thought it was her last day. It is nice to start the day with us all crying.

I can't even tell you the new person's name. I know her resume is longer than my arm. What does that mean to me? She doesn't do one thing for very long, and I'm not talking about interim positions. My charge nurse didn't work today at least in our unit. She had to spend some time some where with administration going over things with this new person. She did tell one of my coworkers that she told this person that "we" weren't going to be very receptive because we are going to be very loyal to our old boss and that "we" don't trust the two doctors that are now in charge of everything. Well, that is kind of true. We are not happy with the two doctors. I don't trust a word that comes out of either of their mouths - one I never have and the other I stop trusting more recently. They flat out lie to us. Nice huh? We are loyal to the boss that has been with the hospital for forty years and she is still in her fifties. But I think we are afraid. We don't know what is happening again. Again, our future is uncertain. Again there are doctors behaving badly and getting their way. We have been told we can't progress because of the leadership we had, but what the hell do we have now???

Wait and see. Go to work and do my job. That is all I can do. I have to keep my mouth shut. I have to just do it. I am scared. There are things that need to be done. There are things that I need done to help the doctors I work with that I haven't been able to get done. Maybe there will be changes now. I don't know. Every doctor thinks their needs are more important than any other doctor and they should have the newest most expensive equipment. I just don't know. I just have to keep going I guess. I just want to cry. A lot. I only hope maybe there are some things we can do better.

Wait and see